Anyone watch My name is Earl? It's semi-decent. The premise is some guy who's bad finally gives up his wicked ways because he fears and respects KARMA.
I had a quick turnaround of karma last night and today. I went to bed last night like I do most nights, and just as I turned off the lights I noticed a worg of a spider hanging out on the wall near my bed. I smile and bid him a good night, but then I remembered one time waking up because a spider crawled on my face, and that was not a fun experience. I'm naked, and cold, and scared a little, and thinking about what to do about this spider. Do I just kill it? Should I put all my clothes on again and take the sucker outside? I decide to be evil, and kill the brute. Note that this is something I rarely do, but I figure it's payback for our last encounter.
I look around. I could swat him with a shoe, or squish him with a sock, or burn him with a candle-lighter. I opt for something new, and take my glass of 3-day old water and gently scoop him up in it. And I didn't even have to get out of bed! I watch him struggle for a few seconds and my heart explodes. How could I kill a spider this way? Drowning is an awful way to go. I mean at least with a shoe it's a quick and relatively painless experience.
So I sigh, get some skivvies on and take my glass of water to the bathroom and pour it down the drain. I think the spider survived the experience, but who knows. I was too cold and tired and upset with myself to care at that point. I return to bed and sleep my woes away.
I woke up this morning to a crash and clatter. The glass I used to kill the poor spider was left haphazardly on the edge of the bathroom sink, and now has fallen and shattered on the bathmat and bathroom floor. Sure it wasn't really /my/ fault, it was the fault of the clumsy dewd who was washing his hands after god knows what.
But I can't help but feel that when I step on a tiny forgotten piece of glass and slip and crack my head against the bathtub, I'll be getting my just desserts.
Comments (2)
But you were the one who left the glass on the edge of the sink, right? Maybe the karma is for that and not for killing the spider. Maybe the spider got his wet near-death experience in exchange for having committed some horrible spider sin, such as eating his children.
Posted by Stephen | December 15, 2005 9:51 AM
Posted on December 15, 2005 09:51
Some spiders are very bad. Very, very bad. My policy for black widows is KOS (kill on sight), and most of them are evil, nasty beings that totally deserve being hurried off this mortal coil.
Though there was one time when a smallish black widow rushed out onto a towel my hand was just about to grasp, and before I could register the fact that it was broadcasting excitedly to me, "Oh, hello! Who are you? Can we be friends? What is life all about?" etc. etc. in a bouncy, friendly way, it was a smear on the floor. I still feel very bad about that one.
But most spiders--nope, no guilt. I address their spirits and apologize for offing them, but my rules are: No spiders inside, period, and no black widows on my property. They know the rules. If they violate them, then they are knowingly signing their death warrants.
Posted by Marina | December 22, 2005 1:31 AM
Posted on December 22, 2005 01:31