CraBlogged

And a Hapi Gnu Yuere!

Last night I took mumsy to the Midnight Mass at her church, which was such a lie; it started at 10:30! Church is such a silly place to me. Where else will you hear fifty people chant old texts simultaneously in a monotone? It seriously creeps me out, and I know all about cults. But at the same time, it's refreshingly beautiful once in a while. Take for example last night.

We arrive at 10, extra early so that we can hear their choir sing a mini christmas concert. "Sing we now of Christmas". I love that phrasing; it makes it sound majestic and regal. On came a dozen or so of all ages to enchant et chanter un chanson or two. I believe I weathered the whole experience stoically. I am such a music snob. What is wrong with me? I smile warmly at these people singing to me, but I find my brow slowly creasing, more and more into a malign furrow. I quickly realize my disposition and smile brightly again and shine my eyes enthusiastically at these singers. But mere moments later my brow furrows again as my mind attempts to reconcile 12 different voices singing in disharmony under a blaringly loud electronic keyboard.

I clapped the heartiest. I really did. Excuse me sir, do I have any grey poupon equivalent of music? Such a snob.

One of the sermons really got to me though. He was talking about how to assay evilness and to be a good person. The trick was to REMAIN VIGILENT!!! (mic overload). I must fight against the evils in my heart, including but not limited to, fornication, lust, evil thoughts, on and on - each one I ticked off in my head, yup, done that, ooh should try that, well not murder, sure (unless mosquitoes count?), but then at the end, with a quirk to his smile, "the evil eye". I was curious what this was and how to prevent my soul to damnation should I mistakenly evil-eye someone. But just to make the list complete, I sort of cocked my head to the side and squinted one eye. Was it evil enough? I wasn't so sure.

With the list (mostly) complete, I felt that I indeed was human, abased, shamed, and ready for the scouring of my soul's redemption. With just a few chants in monotone, I was cleansed of all sins and wrongdoing, including hopefully the evil-eye if it was indeed evil enough. However during this I believe I cheated - I added rhythm, excitement and pitch to my prayer. Is this allowed? I don't think it was, as Mom gave me a quick shush, when she caught me reading the prayer as if a story to a child, with glamour and sparkles of adventure. Ah well, I believe I can live with sin until next year's dispelling of evil in my heart.

I may seem brash and a bit harsh here, and for those religious enough to read this I apologize if I seem offensive. I needed to get this out after being so so good for a whole two hours! I say, it was the best christmas present I could have given my mom, and I'll do it every year, gladly. I got to sing with a bunch of people, harmony too which seemed to either surprise or annoy those around me. We got to light candles and hug and greet all those around us and wish merry christmasses. I got the idea that I am a horrible, terrible, sinful person forced down my gullet but almost immediately, redeemed for this. It was a rollercoaster of emotions, but the best of all was the happiness and love in my mom's eyes for taking her.

Worth absolutely every sin.

Merry Christmas my lovelies! Merry Christmas!