Scary things abound in this world, non?
Last weekend Maryl and I visited one of those spookatoriums, remember those? Last time I went, I believe Ben's mum took us all downtown to some place or another that was converted into a big haunted maze. You run around and people jump out and scare you and, is that techno music? Around this corner's a zombie-man, around this is a mummy-man, around the other corner is a picture of a zombie-man making sweet sweet vampire love to mummy-man. At the time we were all too cool for it. It wasn't scary, but it's supposed to be fun, right, but we were at the perfect age where we were above everything, where showing enjoyment and happiness just wasn't cool. So we walked nonchalantly through the maze, raising our eyebrows in sarcadonism at all the poor actors trying to get us to enjoy life. Ha to them I said! Ha!
But this time around I vowed to appreciate it. People were putting real effort in attempting to be spooky, and what can you do be but polite and pretend to jump? They had a bunch of different events, instead of a big giant maze. The first, was called the Black Hole, which definitely had nothing to do with anything extremely naughty. There was a 15 minute line, but during the wait I pumped myself up to get scared and excited, which definitely had nothing to do with anything extremely naughty. Unfortunately, we were right behind a gaggle of teenage girls, and I had forgotten my earplugs. Upon first entering, they all immediately began screaming as loud as they could, even though nothing in the least was frightening. In fact, it was very disappointing, as it was simply a corridor without any lights. So we were fumbling around looking to figure out where to go. I suppose that's scary? Once in a while people would attempt to jump out and scare us, but all of that was lost due to 5 girls constantly wailing at max volume. Around a corner was neat - a bunch of dismembered heads on strings swaying in strobe lights! Fun stuff! At some point, the girls got so scared they jumped behind us and began to herd us forward with loud screams and pushes, and really that was the scariest part, getting pushed forward in pitch-black by a gaggle of screaming girls.
Next we went on a ride where you sit down and go through a tunnel and things pop out. It was a 25 minute wait. The ride lasted 1.5 minutes. Two things jumped out, but we were slightly ahead of the timing, so we had to look behind us to actually see what was making noise.
Two more events - the Asylum and the maniac maze I believe it was/were. Both featured stolen art to assail the senses as we waited another 25 minutes each. Was that the cheshire cat from the Alice video game? And those zombies look impressively similar to those in resident evil. The maze was fun, you get to put on 3d glasses and walk through halls painted up in neon lights where it looked like faces and hands were reaching out at you. At the end you walk along a bridge but all around you the walls are spinning in a circle. It feels like you're getting rolled all the way onto the ceiling - I could literally feel myself falling, but once you exit, you realize it was all an illusion and the bridge wasn't moving at all. The asylum had beds and bodies and murderers and emo-kids, and one particular treat - squishy walls that close in all around you. Those claustrophobic would tremble in sadness. We both did indeed!
There were other events, but the lines just kept getting bigger. Waiting upwards of 40 minutes for a 2-3 minute event just didn't suit us, so we left, but not before seeing a live show of an escape artist try to wrestle out of chains before his head gets sawed off! To techno/metal music!
Tonight we're taking Holden out trickertreatin' in his dragon costume. I am very, very excited by the prospect of "inspecting" all of his candy to.. you know, make sure it's safe. Happy Hallowcandy!