CraBlogged

Heh!

2008-07-04T15:53:03Z

The wedding was incredible. It took a total of 5 grand minutes for the ceremony, and another 5 minutes to officially sign. My only regret was Elvis wasn't there to officiate. It was nice though, short and sweet. Afterwards we headed to a nice B&B an hour away by a beautiful lake. 5 course meals included steak and one of the best pecan pies I've had (over saturated with canadian maple syrup). So indeed the deed is done. Nothing feels different though, which I suspect is normal for people who have spent 95% of their time together in the last few years. Did I expect otherwise? I'm not sure! I think there's a note of finality to our relationship that wasn't there. Always that one tiny bit of uncertainty which is now washed away. Anyway! Lots of fun stuff since then. We went strawberry picking again! This time we only took TWO of the four buckets that we bought last year. So.. only 15 pounds of strawberries? I know, we wussed out (read: learned out lesson). No upset bellies, and thankfully, no buckets full of rotting fruit attracting hordes of fruit flies. We had the perfect amount of 3 days full of mixing copious amounts of strawberries with ice cream, angel food cake, cereal, pancakes, and straight out of the can whipped cream. Holden was ecstatic with the amount of desserts we had, and is a bit confused as to why we're not continuing the trend of overindulgence. To combat my expanding belly, I bought a jumprope to skip around for 20 minutes a day. Maryl had said that jump roping was X amount times better than jogging. Her source was the internet... and when has the world wide web ever mislead me? I was surprised that after 5 minutes of skipping rope I was breathless and in muscle pain. Dang that stuff really does the trick! I've slowly worked my way up to 15 minutes of NON-continuous jumping. I hope soon to be able to jump for that long without tripping or dying from exhaustion! (I know it's terribly frightening, but I'm getting better. I'm only half a week in and seeing marvelous improvements.... thank you, four years of sitting on my butt in front of a computer...) A few days ago was canada day. Suspiciously close to USA day, I know! And then in a week or two is Bastille day or something? Seriously people, it's obvious you're just making up stuff so that people have excuses to skip out on work in the summer and have bbqs and fireworks. There's no need to try and force patriotism in on people for made up vacations. Enjoy this Ice Cream Flavored Treat: A gift from GOD! Please visit your local God-depot to appreciate the grandness of Continued Ice Cream Flavored Treats. You see what I did there? (Facetiousness!) Discount movie tickets on Canada day inspired us to check out Wall E. Probably one of the best pixar film I've seen, surpassing even Rat-chef. I have a new way of reviewing these things: how long does it keep Holden entertained? Ratatouille was an 8/10 -- Holden got up out of his chair thrice, asked to go home once, had to go pee once in the middle, and demanded a seat change twice, but stayed to the end and liked it. Charlotte's Web was a 7/10 by these standards. Firehouse Dog was either a 4/10 or a 10/10 depending on how I would categorize a child falling asleep during it. Wall E however was a definite 10/10 though. He sat transfixed and entertained by the magnificence of this flick for the whole hour and a half. Days afterwards, he still talks about it. I still tickles me when I imagine the "mice" scurrying over him when he fell into the trash pit. The best thing of all is, whenever we take a walk and he stops to stray behind, all I have to do is jut out my hand and shout out in a high pitched whine, "WAAAAAALLLLLY?!?!?!?!?", and he comes scampering up to clutch it and hug me. You can't pay for stuff like that. Oh wait, you can, for $10. $12 for 3 people on discount day!

The biggest day

2008-06-20T18:02:56Z

Been a while since I've written here, but that's not to say my life has paused. Recent events include: going to the zoo, exploding sodas in the freezer, visits to see firetrucks and policemen, playing frisbee golf at an official course, oh, and getting married today? Yeah, that! So why the elopement? I could give a dozen "reasons" (i.e. excuses), but the simple matter of the fact is I'm entirely in love with the most wonderful girl I could ever imagine, and her exquisite, rambunctious son who can already beat me at video games. So why wait? I've called up almost everyone I know, and they've all said the same thing. Lots of encouragement, support, and fists shaking, as if to say, "Why I outta!" <3 My lovely friends and family, I wish you could be here, but you are all already with me. Not in my heart, not in my mind, but in my little pocket where I keep parts of your souls, secreted away until I can whip up ransom notes. As promised, here's a picture of the Bride to Be Encore. Wait! That's not Maryl, that's just a tapir. Sorry, the colors confused me. Let me see... Here we go! This is how I best love to see her: Best to you all, thinking of you, yes you, and no, she's not knocked up.

My latest fetish

2008-05-14T00:38:11Z

I'm doing something awful, but I can't stop. Let me take you back... way back... to a week ago, maybe two. We three are walking down our business, minding our own street, when someone approaches us and says, "WOAHOLYSHIZ The candy store down the street is having some crazy OMGOSCHEKSITOUTNOW", so we venture to ourselves, "wise not?" "why snot?" We see the candy store and yes indeed, there are plentiful kids milling about, and the air was filled with something that smelled an awful lot like excitement. Lo, inside, if you buy $10 worth of candy (crazy candy I might add! Wacky kinds!! We got mini mario mushrooms filled with awful tasting candies but the mushrooms were made of tin! It's cute!), then you get a free stuffed animal! Not any animal, mind you, but, a certifiable Webkinz! Never heard of it? We almost did business with them, actually. They sell real life stuffed animals to kids, who then take codes attached to the tag and plop them online to see their stuffed animal that they bought in real life come to unreal life in video game format. You can deck out their rooms, feed them, teach them, play with them, etc, etc, use your imagination. The shtick is you need to get online cash by playing their online games (and other methods of course). The games range in difficulty from Holden understands how to win and gets a few ins in, to Holden likes the noises when you die repeatedly, to Holden is so baffled by them that he presses keys really fast and hopes to win but then never plays it again. They suck you in pretty easily, perhaps even taking some cues from World of Warcraft. Every day, you can click a button to earn money and food, and if you click that button every day for seven days, your rewards get bigger and brighter and on the seventh day, you can win a big prize. Every day you can spin a wheel for bonus money and prizes - dressers for your room, clothes for your pet, you name it. Every day you can go on a wild gem hunt to try to find rare gems and collect them all for a crown of omg. But all only ONCE a day. Holden loves, he loves it to death. Then I found something downright nasty. They have tournaments where you submit your score against 20-30 other KIDS, and whoever gets the highest score gets megabucks. At first I was just checking it out with Holden, and then, I found myself logging on. I play the hardest, quickest games, and... and... I justified it as simply getting Holdy some extra cash to deck out his room. I'm doing it for him, right? For him? No, I just like dominating seven year olds in stupid, easy web games. Wait. Replace dominating with beating. Wait... um. Well doc, this has been a great session, I feel a whole lot better - nope, no need to come back next week, I'm all cured - yup! thanks! seeyalaterbyebye! By the way, it's too cute, he named his frog pet "Furry Headcombo". What did your kid name their pet? Yeah, thought so.

Do yourself a flavor

2008-05-12T00:36:43Z

and spend six minutes checking this out. It's one of those "wow, that floored me" + "omg people have way too much time on their hands" type deals.

The most important thing you'll ever see:

2008-05-08T18:52:56Z

Well, if you're me.

Fish Facts

2008-05-04T22:01:54Z

Joey-Com isn't eating. Maybe his palate is too refined for "Betta Buffet" pellets. I thought that the adjustment from a small plastic cup to a moderately sized fish bowl would slightly affect his diet, and I was allowing a day or so to compensate. Alas, he nibbles a pellet and spits it out and swims around and floats for most of the day. We cleaned out the bowl, as the food was beginning to rot. That was quite an ordeal, as we didn't have any of the right tools for the job. The ladle was too big, the spoon wa too small, and the wooden stirring spoon was too long and clumsy. We knew enough not to use our hands... but that's about it. Eventually we just kept pouring and pouring the water out until he had nothing else to do except to flop into the transitory cup. And those silly red rocks we got to sit at the bottom of the bowl are a disaster! Impossible to clean the non-eaten pellets from them, and most went down the drain because of it. I don't know. Is he happy in here, with his fake plastic sea-plant, and his strange red rocks, and his bottled water, and his Betta Buffet Pellets? Do fish feel? Can they get depressed? Is he happier here than in the store where people actually knew what to do to take care of him, even if it's a life in a tiny cup? Does he "like" bigger spaces? Does his brain produce "ZING ZING ZING!"s when he eats or is in good water?

Fishy pizza

2008-05-02T21:43:12Z

Here's a hint. Pizza Hut has a buffet lunch - did you know this? Maybe I knew it tucked in the back of my mind and gut. Maryl knew this, and thought it would be such a larf to take Holden out to all-you-can-eat-even-if-you're-four-and-can-surprisingly-manage-to-eat-five-slices buffet. Yeah, he went crazy on that sauce. Maybe because we're used to healthy-baked pizza, and the super-grease slices went straight to his brain. Also? They have desert pizzas. He had four slices of those. I was skeptical at first, as I've been suuuper conscious about what goes in his belly, but Maryl assured me that it's important to show a little boy true gluttony at least once every five years. This is a philosophy I can really get behind! Get it? Behind. Like, my behind will grow a lot. Once every 5 years or something. Hi. Across the street there was an animal store, and Holden promised he would be good enough to go in and visit the lizards, turtles, snakes and of course fish. THEN VARIOUS THINGS HAPPENED ONE THING LED TO ANOTHER We now have a fish. It's a Betta, and his name is Joey-Com. Holden is excellent with names. The tricky part is I don't really know what the heck I'm doing in regards to caring for a fish, as, yes, I am the primary caretaker. Caretaker is a scary word; involving graveyards and stuff right? Well, don't jinx it, because I plan to keep this sucker alive for at least a week.

A Holden Story

2008-04-26T18:05:27Z

Peekaroo lives in the swamp inside Russia, and he doesn’t know much about Zero but Zero knows such amount about peekaroo. But peekaroo doesn’t know much about what toxins him. The What doesn’t know why the stuff gets offered to him. And his missile shook at his contacts did no pay but no attention did no pay. And then the stuff shook; there was a cheesy on the ground, but peekaroo doesn’t know much about that. He swonks it but it doesn’t pay any more its wonks and swonks, but wasn’t enough pay. He had but his middle shook anyways as he didn’t know much about his missiles because and his toxins were a little bit spoiled. There’s a cheesy on the ground! The end.

Fun Family Frolics

2008-04-15T22:11:22Z

So what's been going on? The snow has melted. It's pretty interesting up here now, because it turned from OMGCOLD + stay inside if you want to live, to ... well, California weather. More like Santa Cruz weather. Breezy, beautiful; I wore a t-shirt and shorts for the first time in so many months I can barely remember. In other words, it's excellent. I took a long walk to Holden's daycare and we took a long walk back, with a stop off at the mall of course for chocolate milk and cookies. Oh, in our new shoes too! I feel like a new man with the weather. Or maybe a bear waking up from hibernating during winter. Last weekend we visited Maryl's extended family on her father's side. Holden's Great-grammy was having a birthday party and their house was filled with food, fun, and games. Sound familiar? I really miss the feeling of having so many loved ones around, playing various card and board games. It's strange though, because I'm used to not missing that, what with being with my own family for the first time in my life. Feeling so warm and comfortable... it's hard to remember there's other people in this world! >_> I'm sure once the newness of it all dies down? Oh, they served something there pronounced roo-lah-din. Basically it's a pickle wrapped up inside sliced ham, AND thinly sliced beef. Surprisingly good!, though, I wanted more pickle taste. <3

Mind blowing

2008-04-08T18:16:17Z

Very odd; I believe this is the first year that I've forgotten my Birthday. It wasn't until halfway through the day when I checked me alt-email did I find a happy-b-day-e-card from the mass known as Benmeg. I was confused and then I felt silly. This has never happened to me! Mostly it's because we did the bulk of the celebrating on the weekend, as Maryl's in Toronto today on business. Can I describe to you something wonderful though? Thank you! Oreo cookie platform. Social tea biscuit layer. Mint chocolate ice cream middle. ??? layer including mocha nescafe coffe cafe thing??? Then to top it off, a brownie layer. Yes, that was my home-made birthday cake. I've only asked for one thing consistently every year and that is an ice cream cake. This was the cake to end all cakes. The best part is now she has to one-up herself next year. What will be different? Perhaps a layer of thin mint delights on top of the brownie layer? I'm giddy with anticipation! In another news: 2 more until 30. What the heck?

Chompers

2008-04-03T00:31:02Z

Holden had a visit to the dentist today to get his teeth cleaned. It was a surprising visit. I expected screams and cries and whines and pleads and flopping around, but instead he was a super trooper. He took it like a man, with quiet dignity, even with silly sunglasses on. It was an entirely painless experience, all because of him. He followed every direction from the dentists, opening his mouth, moving his chin, all without complaint or worry. His teeth were picked at, sprayed on, polished and flossed. What a champ. For a reward he got a five dollar bill to do with as he pleased. At the mall he decided on three chocolate chip cookies (I talked him down from four), and some chocolate milk. Right after the dentist, I know! I remember fondly my mom's deal with me; after each harrowing dentist trip, I'd get the rest of the day off of school... and we'd always stop by McDonald's to share some fries. A simple enough reward, which worked wonders for me. I even remember one time when she wanted to take me back to school, and I looked at her and said, "But Mom, it's tradition. It's our own special bonding time, why would you want to give that up?" I guess I really liked fries to pull a guilt trip like that! So, $2 for cookies/milk, which left him with 3 more to go. We walked around and he decided he wanted to ride a car. More than the car jumping up and down, he enjoyed the process of putting a coin in the machine. Reminder to self: keep him away from slot machines. So we were down to $2, and I asked him what next. He thought for a bit and looked up and said, "Maybe a book?" I mean seriously, can you ask for a better boy? We settled on a $1.98 coloring book which had giant crayons attached. I think this was his first real experience with money. On the walk home we talked over exactly how much money he started with, and all the various places it went, and which was the best use of money. His regret was not having enough money to ride the car-machine all day!

Fool me once

2008-04-02T14:30:21Z

Holden makes the best April Fools joke. He got me good with, Harry, there's a bear on your knee! Freaked-me-out!

Oh hey

2008-03-31T21:40:55Z

I forgot about this thing again. Weird. Anyway, How was your Easter? Mine was filled with crazy antics INCLUDING a poor boy whose father thought it would be neat to give him as much chocolate as he wanted for two days straight. It was tricky during potty time, let's just say there were mops involved. That and 2 washes of our sheets that experienced explosive vomiting. Because really, it makes you a great guy to a kid if you give 'em everything they want, amirite? Rant over! The rest of Easter was lovely, we went to Maryl's mums place, and she had set up not just ham but duck too. I can only remember one other time having duck, which was at some strange china town in some state (NY? NJ? CA? I can't even remember), and it was peking duck. As I remember it, it was deep fried and served in soft pancakes, but, it took hours to prepare. Could be my sense of time was skewed, being such a youngster. Egg hunts are always my favorite, always have been, most likely due to the fact that my childhood is riddled with memories of them. Probably because my birthday always included one, so if you're counting that's two egg hunts a year except for those years where my birthday happened to fall on Easter itself. Or... was my mum tricksy and only celebrated one on top of the other? In any case, she would go all out, which is saying a lot because we had a comprehensive yard! Always check the rooster house, because the "special" egg likes to hide there. That one's filled with money! <3 The last two nights, Maryl and I happened upon free sushi. One was a gift certificate unused since christmas, taking us to the highest quality sushi in town. Surprisingly there's at least three in the neighborhood, including an all-you-can-eat sushi place for 20$ dinner. You sit and then order and they keep bringing more until you cry uncle. But the expensive one was quite lovely and full of quality sushi/sashimi/rolls/etc, and though we had a 50$ gift certificate, we still paid fifteen on top of that for the two of us. The next day we had a last minute invitation down to Toronto for an extended-family-related birthday, and it was sushi again. Neither of us complained. Did you notice the part where I ate raw fish? Who am I anymore? I'm a man who eats fish and beans and actually likes them, that's who!

Man

2008-03-23T04:56:23Z

Ok so I went to the store and got Caramel Covered Macaroons. Macaroons are NOT Macadamia nuts. They are very dissimilar. Macaroons apparently are considered coconutty. Sad sad sad sad but really not that sad because they're still not that bad not like eating frog gizzards. Caramel covered frog gizzards.

What year is it?

2008-03-17T18:13:23Z